


Arcade's Tumblr Hockey Shorts

by ArcadeGhostAdventurer



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: AUs, Ch1 Goose Feeder, Ch2 Fake Dating, Ch3/5 Geno's Too Many Cats, Drabbles, Fluff and Crack, M/M, One Shot, One Shot Collection, Online Friendship, Tumblr Prompt, writings first posted on my tumblr basically
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-10
Updated: 2016-06-17
Packaged: 2018-06-01 09:37:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6512947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArcadeGhostAdventurer/pseuds/ArcadeGhostAdventurer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Collection of short fics I posted on / got prompted on Tumblr but edited and expanded. </p><p>Feel free to prompt me for more!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. i was the guy fighting a duck for my pants and loosing

**Author's Note:**

> I'm arcadeghostadventurer on Tumblr too, come and prompt me!!

 

 

**Inspired by the image above.**

(This one was posted on ao3 before, but while cleaning some old fics, I deleted all my work a couple months ago. So... Here it is again.) 

 

 

Sid is sitting at a bench by the lake, rereading his class notes when the guy appears. It’s an unseasonably warm day. The sun is out, so are the people of the campus. So is the tall guy in blue basketball shorts. Feeding ducks by the little artificial lake and promptly throwing Sid’s any and all plans about studying out of the window. And into the lake. With those slinky basketball shorts that don’t hide his cute butt at all. Sid can literally see his motivation drowning along with soggy breadcrumbs.

 

Sid slinks down a little on the bench, trying to hide behind his notes and see more of the guy at the same time. He feels like those detectives in the cartoons with eye holes cut out on their newspaper and it’s definitely embarrassing but it’s worth it, he figures. Considering the guy is bent down sideways with his cute bubble butt sticking out with a silly smile on this face trying to pet the ducks and keep his bag of breadcrumbs out of their pecking range. Who the hell pets ducks anyway? And looks that good while doing it.

 

The quack that doesn’t really sound like a quack is what takes Sid out of his cute butt induced trance. Three geese come closer to investigate the action, which doesn’t seem to deter neither the ducks nor the tall handsome guy with cute butt. Knowing how rough geese can get, Sid feels serious concern about his wellbeing but the guy doesn’t seem to mind. Apparently his love of animals doesn’t know boundaries such as might bite your finger off. Or he just doesn’t recognize a goose when he sees one.

 

The guy keeps throwing more breadcrumbs out for geese but between the three of them and the handful of ducks they clear them out faster than he can throw. They are also fast to figure out where the breadcrumbs come from. When one of them practically screams right into the still bent over guy’s face, Sid just can’t stifle his laugh. Shit. Which results in the guy turning to look him with a smile on his face, momentarily forgetting about his animal companions. Which results in two geese getting a hold of the paper bag in his hand with their beaks. And the other one getting a hold on his shorts which apparently has another paper bag in its pocket. Shit indeed.

 

The following events are a bit lost on Sid, since he was barely able to hold his head upright while laughing. The goose manages to pull the guy’s shorts down to his knees, making him lose his balance and tackle him down to the ground. For a second all Sid can see is a bunch of flailing ducks running around, going in between saving themselves from the six foot guy that fell onto them and not leaving the breadcrumbs strewn all over from the ripped bag behind. One goose flings itself right out of the white flurry with the blue shorts hanging from its beak, the guy running behind him in a tshirt and- fucking God, tight boxer briefs. Shit, Sid thinks, looking at him run after the goose in between people’s laughs. His stomach sinks a little. He didn’t get to talk to the cute butt guy. He most probably didn’t really make a nice first impression by sitting and laughing at him instead of helping. Also the campus is huge, with facilities for more than ten majors. Which means he probably won’t see the cute butt guy again. He sighs. His butt was really cute though, Sid thinks as he collects his papers, a little bit crushed by the geese himself.

 

\--

 

When Flower sends him the text a couple days later, he’s almost forgotten about the whole incident. Almost. Well, he’s been trying. The text reads, “saw it this morning by the lake lol desperation on defs anothr lvl” and there is a photo attached. When Sid opens the file, he almost laughs out in the middle of the class. It’s of a note, printed out on a A4 paper and taped on a bench, the bench, “MISSED CONNECTION. You were the guy sitting on bench. I was fighting big duck for my pants and losing. If you saw, please call. Ps. I have them back! Lets hang out!!” and a phone number. Sid doesn’t text back to Flower, he can definitely thank him in person later.

 

But he does call the phone number first thing after the class is finished. It rings a couple times and Sid is reminded that he just came out of an 8AM session, which means it’s only 9AM yet and the cute butt guy might be still sleeping like all other reasonable people do at 9AM. Sid slinks into a corner, away from the bleary crowd making its way out of the hall. He thinks about hanging up, guiltily chewing his lip, when the guy finally picks up.

 

“Yes?” He sounds sleepy and rough. Sid internally curses himself for being unable to wait.  Not knowing what to say, he ends up rambling into his phone, getting redder and redder by the second.

 

“Umm hi. I, ugh, I’m the guy from the bench the other day?” Sid covers his face with a hand, thankful that the guy can’t actually see him. “I saw the note you left, actually my friend sent it to me, I mean, not like the physical thing, a photo of it, um… I mean not that he knew it was for me but I thought…” He gets interrupted by the guy laughing. Sid cringes but the cute butt guy doesn’t even bring up being woken up.

 

“Yes, yes, thanks you called, I’m not think you would, you know. And make myself look silly too. I’m see you before big duck happen but can’t come say hi with no pants on, yes?”

 

Sid feels a smile spread over his face. “Well yeah, I guess. So, umm, we can definitely hang out maybe.” What is he even saying? Definitely? Maybe? Good job Sid, you’re really acing this thing. “I’m Sid by the way.” He can practically hear the guy smiling on the other end though, so maybe he isn’t doing that bad.

 

“I’m Evgeni but you call Geno, easier.” Sid repeats it to himself, entirely forgetting the fact that he’s on the phone, which earns him another laugh. His face is burning but it’s worth it. It’s a cute laugh. Like his butt. Fuck, Sid thinks, he’s totally going to have a date with the cute butt guy. With Geno.

 

“You free today? Now? I’m wake already, got class at ten thirty but we get some coffee together maybe?” Asks Geno.

 

“Um, sure. Down in the cafeteria?” He starts walking down the now empty corridor.

 

 “No Sid you go wait at the bench? I bring coffee and you take down the note for me?” Sid laughs.

 

“Sure.” He says, making his way down the stairs, no one else needs Geno’s number anyway.

 

 “Be there in thirty, yes? See you Sid.”

 

“See you Geno.” Returns Sid, hanging up. Maybe geese aren’t that bad, he thinks, when he’s walking through the garden. The sun is out just like the other day. Flower will be pissing himself laughing when Sid tells him the story. Yeah, Sid thinks when he finally rips the note off of the bench, sitting the same spot he was sitting a just couple days ago, geese isn’t that bad at all. And even if they are, it’s worth it. Sid nods. There is a method to the geese’s madness.


	2. fake dating, real kisses

As their lips part, Geno thinks he just maybe, _maybe_ , kind of might have fucked this up.

 

A little _tiny_ bit.

 

Sid is looking up at him like he has just grown a second head. And an extra arm. And Geno just might as well have kissed a brick wall. Unease sits heavy in his gut with a litany of _fucked it up, fucked it up, fucked it up_ in his mind. He sneaks a glance at Sid’s face. He is still standing there, his hazel eyes open wide and staring somewhere behind  Geno’s head.

 

He at least should have kept it chaste. And he _really_ shouldn’t have tried to suck Sid’s bottom lip into his own mouth.

 

“Did you just-” Sid squints at him, one of his hand come up to point at him but it falls back to his side again.

 

Geno shrugs. He wishes he had some self control. Like, maybe just a pinch of self control.

 

“But, I mean, the guys have just left, like, there is nobody to...” His hand comes up to point back into the empty living room this time. He stays there, frozen, gaping like a fish and Geno feels genuinely bad.

 

“Sorry Sid, not think.”

 

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN NOT TH-” Sid shouts, high pitched and scratchy, startling a jump out of him, then abruptly stops to start rambling with a slightly forced reasonable voice.

 

“I mean, for sure, it… It happens, right? Like, it’s been a week trying to convince the boys and, uh, it’s alright if you just got- It’s okay, yeah, you just didn’t think- Like, now you do, obviously and you stopped. So you’re thinking. I mean, um- It’s- I’ll forget. I mean-”

 

Geno finds himself herded outside in between all those rambling. He doesn’t quite get what just happened until he hears the door slammed behind him and the cold air hits his face. He stands there for a moment, trying to make his short-circuited brain work.

 

The muffled “thump” noise from the other side of the door brings him back to himself. Yes, he says to himself. _Think._ I am. _Thinking._ He rolls his shoulders. He can’t really make it worse, but he can at least try to explain Sid. Tell him. Tell him what he’s thinking. Has been thinking. For a long, _very long_ time.

 

He turns back on his heels, almost head-butting the door and punches the doorbell. Sid answers at once, though by cracking the door open just enough to peer outside. Geno can’t help but think it’s quite adorable actually.

 

“Okay, I’m think now, and come back.”

 

“What?!” Sid’s voice cracks on the exclamation. Looking into the pair of huge hazel eyes, Geno feels his crazy courage deflating a little bit, but he squares his shoulders.

 

“You say is okay you not think, now I’m think, come back, want kiss you again.”

 

The silence streches between them. Geno starts to think maybe this was a bad idea. The bet was to make everyone believe they were together but Geno should have known it would get out of control. He should have known he would somehow trick himself to think Sid’s actions were at least a little bit genuine deep down somewhere.

 

Well, those genuine deep down feelings were only on his side, apparently.

 

“Really?”

 

Okay, maybe not.

 

Sid’s voice is so small that Geno almost doesn’t hear him over his internal monologue of _“Congrats, You Have Managed to Fuck up Again!!”_ Sid is still peering through the door, but maybe, thinks Geno, there is some chance that he did not fuck it up that bad.

 

He points to the door.

 

“I come in now?”

 

As soon as Sid opens the door to take him in Geno pushes his lips onto Sid’s and, well, maybe he did not fuck up at all this time.

 

Shaky starts don’t count as fucking up, he determines, as Sid returns his kiss this time.


	3. au where geno is sid’s “too many cats owner" internet friend

 

“dnt knw how it get insid e hr noes!!!((((((” types Geno, apparently still too stressed to type ‘nose’ or anything else right, even though he got Bunny to the vet immediately.

 

Bunny, of course, being his oldest cat.

 

Geno, _of course_ , thinks it’s the funniest thing ever.

 

“She look like big bunny when I find her outside. She lost all her whiskers, very sad cat.” He told Sid once, when he first sent a picture of a very uninterested looking, fat ball of fur with the ‘bunny say hi!!!))))’ caption.

 

“I think, just gonna take to the vet, they take care, but they say very old, maybe not get new home, then decide to keep.”

 

He laughed at Sid a lot, after he felt the need to _correct_ Geno about his _bunny_ being a _cat_. 

 

Sid didn’t intend to befriend the weird Russian guy who enrolled into the wrong course on Coursera. But somehow, he found himself enjoying reading the constant casual discussions that went on the “Paradoxes of War” Hangouts group.

 

So when Geno asked for help on the third week’s assignment, well, Sid thought he could at least give back a little bit after stalking the group about updates since the beginning.

 

About two hours later, the other participants stated, politely but firmly, that they should keep their debate on ‘whether the quality of war mapping in heavy winter and tolerable weather could ever be on the same level’ outside of the group chat and stop spamming people’s phones.

 

So they started their own chat outside the group.

 

Which resulted in their own constant casual conversation.

 

And cat related drama.

 

Geno had 4 cats, Sid could swear that every single day, something different happened to them. Or, more likely, Geno was like those way too attentive mothers about his cats.

 

“Sid he gnaw on puck, you think he break teeth?!!??!?”

 

“Sid, Bubble sleep in litter box, how I’m teach her not to ((((((”

 

“Sid, Dirty had 4 licks less water today, you think I’m buy bib maybe???!!?!”

 

Sid thought it was adorable, really. Maybe a little too much stress on Geno, but as far as he knew, Geno was living alone. And all his free time, well, he gave it to his cats. It made Geno happy.

 

In turn, Sid told him about his game predictions, albeit while not giving away why his predictions on Pens were so on point all the time. About a new stretch routine he “found on the internet”. How terrible it was that right after he shovelled his driveway, it started snowing again.

 

It was great, really. To have someone you could talk to, without them seeing you as Sidney Crosby, Sid the Kid, The Next One, but rather as… Sid. Just plain Sid, who really liked hockey and didn’t mind talking his friend through his cat related dramas.

 

Who Sid has never seen and probably lived on the other side of the country at best. Who Sid would probably never meet. Who would probably freak out if he knew which “Sid” this particular Sid actually was.

 

Great, really.


	4. "too many cats" part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first part of this AU is on the 3rd chapter of this collection. This AU will have at least another part.

It’s agony for both Geno and Sid, when Geno’s new stray (an incredibly fat and shabby cat) turns out to be not only very very fat, but also very very pregnant. It wouldn’t be a problem if Geno had realized this earlier maybe, however the cat had decides to reveal her pregnancy right at the end of the said pregnancy. By going into an agonizingly loud labor at 3AM in the middle of Geno’s living room. Which prompts Geno to immediately go into panic mode and text Sid. 

Sid who is on vacation on the other side of the world, awake and apparently unoccupied enough to get pulled into comforting Geno, sitting at the poolside, Googling cat labor facts on his iPad. By the time babies start coming and he gets inside it’s 8AM for Geno and two in the afternoon for Sid, who is now sporting a magnificently colourful sunburn from the morning sun. Sid throws his dying phone onto the bed, leaves Geno to ogle his new “v ugly & wet, has no ear head all flat)))))” babies and goes to look for the bottle of aloe and his charger. By the time he’s back with his charger in his hand, cooling gel coating his shoulders liberally, his phone is blinking with the “7 New Messages” notification. Sid plugs his phone in and turns up the brightness to see the messages are pictures of all 6 babies kittens separately. They look arguably ugly and unquestionably small in Geno’s hand, not even covering his palm completely. The last photo however, is of a tired looking man smiling while laying on a bloodied carpet behind a very uninterested cat, nursing her kittens. 

“It is Geno,” tells Sid to himself in his head, as he looks at the photo uncomprehendingly. He slowly lays his phone onto the bedside table. Lays face first on the bed, and thinks, “fuck”. 

\--

When Sid wakes from his shock induced, escapist nap; he considers two things.

For one thing, it doesn’t mean much. That Geno sent him a photo of himself. They are… Close friends. As close as they can be through texting but still. It’s not like they don’t talk to each other about their daily life. They send photos of places and things back and forth. It’s a perfectly normal thing to add a face into it for once.

Secondly, it’s a selfie. Friends do these kinds of things. It’s not... Private. Normal people don’t think that way. For fuck sake, there is an app entirely based on the concept of this. And it’s not like Geno is trying to seduce Sid with a selfie that included his bloody carpet, ugly new born kittens and old threadbare house clothing. And it’s not Geno’s fault that Sid’s incredibly reserved brain overthinks everything. 

Sid flinches when his phone slips out of his hands and lands corner first onto his nose. He rubs his watering eyes and sighs. He types “they will grow into their ears” back, realizing he is almost half a day late to respond. Then he feels bad and sends “you need to name them”. When the feeling doesn’t leave, he throws his phone away and goes to call room service for dinner. 

\--

The photo goes forgotten. (No it doesn’t, not for Sid.) Sid sends back a couple generic sunset and hotel room view photos through the rest of his vacation and Geno sends back kittens. And it’s alright. Normal. Other than Sid thinking his every waking second if he’s being a weirdo by not showing Geno his own face. Other than that, it’s fine. Completely. 

And Sid goes home. He runs his hockey school. And he goes back to Pittsburgh. Everything is as they are supposed to be. 

Other than Sid thinking if he is unfitted to make normal friends just because who he is. Other than that, it’s fine.

\--

The next blow to the integrity of Sid’s composure comes about two whole months after The Selfie Incident. 

Geno had been talking about taking the kittens for a check-up and the getting the mother neutered, since the kittens stopped nursing and started eating solid food consistently. And because his work didn’t give him neither time nor enough budget for so many vet trips, he apparently decided to stuff his precious babies into three cat carriages: mother in one, three kittens each in the other two boxes; and haul their asses to a sanctuary. 

And again, Sid goes down with an innocent photo. A photo of three carriages on top of each other with their unamused habitants reaching out through the cage bars, in front of the Animal Rescue League Center’s sign.

Which is in Pittsburgh. Sid’s been there. He knows.

The huge sign sits in the background unassumingly, with complete disregard to the emotional turmoil Sid is in.

And Sid doesn’t even have time to take an escapist nap this time. Sid needs to go to the mandatory skate. Sid needs to give off-day interviews. All while knowing Geno was so fucking close all this time.

Fuck Sid’s life honestly. 

\--

After a full day of contemplating while trying to look interested in coaches, trainers, PR and media people; Sid is left feeling a bit let down by his own brain. 

First of all, it needs to stop freaking out. Sid should have figured this one out himself, long ago. Geno is a huge Pens fan for crying out loud. Where was Sid assuming he would be living in? Florida? 

Second of all; it, again, doesn’t make any difference. Geno has no idea who Sid is. No matter how many texts they send to each other a day. No matter how many times they rant about anything and everything to each other. No matter how many times they comfort each other through daily struggles. No matter how many times they laugh over stupid photos or a good hockey game together…

Sid never planned on telling Geno who he is. He has no such plan still. It doesn’t make a difference.

No matter how bitter Sid feels about it, he knows he can’t do it. Because he knows if he did, then nothing would be the same.

So it doesn’t make a difference.

\--

Sid has an honest to God anxiety attack when Geno tells him very excitedly, ‘all caps’ excitedly, tells him that he’s going to a Pens game. And thankfully, he is excited enough to not realize Sid’s muteness on the topic. Geno sends at least ten texts that are just paraphrasements of “I’m so excited”, goes on and on about how he’s “finally” going to see a game live. 

Sid feels like shit.

After the initial panic passes, it just makes Sid feel even worse to think about Geno’s genuine excitement. Geno could come to every single game he liked, if Sid could just find some courage to be honest about his identity. More so, Sid suddenly realizes how much he considers Geno a real friend. And indeed, it’s been a very, very long time since Geno stopped being the ‘guy with broken English from the online class’. 

And Sid is being very very dishonest to somebody who he considers ‘close’. 

As he steps onto the ice and looks at the cheering crowd, he thinks, Geno is somewhere in there.

Here.

He sighs as he takes his helmet off for the anthem. He will do something about it. He has to, before it’s too late.


	5. too many cats, pt. 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be a tiny side installment, hence the wonky start, however I cannot control myself when I'm prompted so it got out of control. I hope you guys like it, also remember you can always come to my Tumblr and prompt yourself bc interest is always a good way to get your writer to work. :D
> 
> This part wouldn't have happened without the very kind and poke-y theladyscribe. <3

_theladyscribe replied to your post“@theladyscribe replied to your photoset “AU Idea Where Geno Is Sid’s…”_

_what if they decide to do voice chat/screen share to discuss a project they’re working on and sid accidentally turns on video and geno is just sitting there gobsmacked not saying anything and sid is like “geno? geno? are you still there? oh shit is the video on???”_

 

But what * IF * it happens when Geno gets way too excited about the “V Smol Pens Tee” he gets for his oldest cat (because she is the only one who tolerates it), and tries to show it to Sid on video call. Unfortunately, for Sid, without asking. And he calls. And Sid doesn’t get what’s going on, he panics, but it looks like normal call screen so he slides green. And suddenly he is face to face with an annoyed cat and a broadly grinning Geno.

 

The latter one is a problem.

 

Sid is like O_O.

 

Geno’s smile disappears.

 

They look at each other with blank faces for what it feels like both a second and an eternity.

 

Geno ends the call.

 

And he doesn’t return any of Sid’s calls. Nor his texts. Sid is sent into a loop of I AM SORRY and IT ISN’T WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE. He doesn’t know what it looks like honestly but he’s SURE this isn’t that.

 

It’s the longest three days of his life. The unclearness of absolutely everything. No Geno. No cat pictures. And worst of all, he WONDERS. He wonders what Geno is doing with the “cat safe” flower research for his garden. He wonders how the smallest kitten who broke a tooth is faring. He wonders if Bunny is still having problems with grooming herself. He wonders how the “forever home” search for kittens is going.

 

He wonders why Geno had called him in the first place.

 

After coming home with no game analysis notifications on his phone for the first time in a VERY long time, he just sends, “I didn’t want you to treat me differently”.

 

And he tries to fall asleep.

 

He wakes up to, “am still angry((((((((((((( understnd but stil angry(”.

 

It’s much, MUCH, better than what Sid expected. Encouraged, he writes an entire essay to Geno that basically can be summarized with three points.

 

\- He knows it was wrong.

 

\- The only reason he put off telling Geno was that he was scared.

 

\- If Geno would accept, he would like to use Pens pet calendar to promote Geno’s kittens and help them get adopted.

 

And oh! This way they can meet in person and Sid can apologize properly.

 

Sid offers to pick Geno and the six kittens up. Conversation is very stilted. Which, Sid didn’t expect more. He is embarrassed. And he didn’t think Geno’s anger would be gone just because he apologized. But it still hurts. And he realizes, he took the easy way Geno always carried a conversation way too granted. He is determined, but admittedly, with no idea how to rebuild Geno’s trust.

 

In the end, it isn’t him who fixes the mess.

 

It’s the entire Penguins team.

 

“Oh dude, you’re the guy with the cats, right?! My daughter’s always buggin’ Sid for those photos. They’re gold.”

 

“SIX?! Man, unbelievable. How many did you say you got? Sid always says but I can’t keep track man.”

 

“Yeah, Sid told us too. In the living room?! Shit son, I’d so freak the fuck out.”

 

“The carpet is all lost huh, buddy you’re lucky you ain’t got no wife.”

 

The entire thing is the most colorful pet photoshoot in the Pens history. The kittens are on the loose and the players are sprawled on the floor, trying to get the most attention. Though when it becomes clear that the kittens favor Geno more than the catnip mice, the whole cat acquisition race turns into “befriend Geno” competition. Sid is… Happy.

 

And peed on. A lot.

 

The picture of Sidney Crosby swarmed with palm sized kittens breaks Twitter. Not only that, but four get adopted before the photoshoot ends.

 

“Fans very fast, yes,” says Geno, his face mysteriously fallen again, as he loads his two kittens into the trunk of Sid’s car. He sighs, “didn’t expect I miss them so quick.” 

 

Sid bites inside of his cheek.

 

“You had, fun though, right?” He mentally slaps himself. This isn’t how he wanted to have this conversation.

 

Geno gets even quieter. Sid decides to let it slide before he, again, makes some serious damage.

 

By the time they are sitting at a table at the bakery that is the second part of Sid’s apology plan, Sid is painfully aware of how quiet Geno is, how painfully loud the remaining two kittens are and how himself is reeking of cat pee.

 

“You tell… Guys… Team? About me?”

 

Sid whips his head up from the menu to see Geno is still looking at the menu.

 

“Yes?” He says, a little uncertain of if he had been inappropriate. “You’re my friend.”

 

He pauses, “right?”

 

Geno’s face does something. Then he starts laughing. He puts his head on the table and laughs. He stops, inhales ruggedly and then laughs some more.

 

Sid can’t dare to breathe.

 

When his laughing cedes, Geno wipes at his eyes, face blushed and says, “I’m not hug you when you smell cat pee”.

 

All the knots Sid’s been carrying in his stomach loosens. He breaks into a smile.

 

Maybe they’ll be alright after all.


End file.
